Harmony, Kindness, and the Shadow

We may find that we too often act-out impulsively, undermine our own success, and have difficulty meeting our personal goals.  At times our behavior may not be consistent with the way we see ourselves and we may believe that we are driven by forces which are not with in our control.  At least they don’t seem to be within our conscious control.  We easily see the monsters, greed, and selfishness in others but these things we do not see within ourselves. It is as if we have built in mechanisms which protect us from seeing the negative aspects of ourselves.  Unfortunately it is what we don’t see within ourselves which often drives our behavior and makes us anxious, racy and uncomfortable. The denial of our own emotions makes it difficult to get a handle on our compulsive behaviors which may include such challenges as; over-eating eating, smoking, or emotional re-activity at work or with our families. I like the phrase and book title “Romancing the Shadow”.  When we say that we are working against ourselves it seems to be implied that within our psyche there are conflicting parts. For some of my clients this initially may sound crazy and even confusing.  Most of us, however, understand clearly that we do have conflicting emotions and desires.  One part of me wants to sleep and the other parts want to be to work on time.  One part may want to lash out and another part of me wants to act appropriately and skillfully. When we are not handling things well it may be that weare not open and conscious of some of our inner experiences. The goal is not to be mean or hurtful, but to create harmony and wholeness within ourselves, 

written by Don Recupido

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